Predator

Developer: Pack-In-Video     Publisher: Activision     Released: 1989     Genre: Action

We make fun of Acclaim and LJN for their history of terrible licensed games because they deserve it.  But in my opinion Activision deserves their share of derision.  From the Three Stooges to Thunderbirds, Activision’s licensed games were just as bad.  To some extent once could even say they were worse because they had what should have been sure fire slam dunks like Die Hard and Ghostbusters.  Predator is one of the worst games on the NES in nearly every category which is a damn shame.  This one hits a little close to home; I saw Predator in the theater at the age of seven and it blew my mind.  This game blew my mind in a different way and should be avoided at all costs.

The developers were in a bit of a quandary.  Despite what the cover art might suggest the Predator film was not the all-out action bonanza you expect.  The movie spends the majority of its time slowly picking off its cast.  There is only one predator and not even confrontations with guerillas or natives.  A straight up Contra style action game would not have been true to the license. But considering what we got that would have been better. The game barely resembles the film as is as you fight aliens, amoeba, and I don’t know what else.

Your pink jump suit clad Dutch is a helpless protagonist at the beginning of every level.  You start with your fists which are completely useless.  The hit detection is wonky, most enemies are knee high and you can’t duck and punch, and your fists don’t even work on most enemies any way.  To add insult to injury whatever weapons you find are removed after each level.  There are only three weapons: grenades, the machine gun and laser rifle.  The grenades are worthless as there is a delay before they explode.  Both the rifle and machine gun are indispensable as they destroy blocks, which is critical in most levels.

The problems with the game’s combat are mostly moot anyway.  Predator is mainly a platformer, and an especially bad one at that.  The controls are sloppy.  Dutch slides after every movement making it difficult to land on the narrow platforms dotting every level.  The arc of your jumps feels stilted; you either jump too far or too short.  The controls ruin what could have been the interesting level design.  The stages have redesigned from the MSX original since they scroll.  But that brings its own set of problems.  The layout is frequently confusing; to the point the game has an arrow to guide you.  The graphical design makes little sense as it is hard to distinguish platforms from the background.  Between this and the knock back when hit and every level is a platforming nightmare.

I’m struggling to find anything good to say about Predator.  I realize there were no enemy soldiers in the movie but the game could have used a better set of antagonists.  Glowing scorpions, bubbles, and living rocks are incredibly lame.  You do fight the Predator multiple times but these encounters are just as disappointing as the rest of the game.  He crouches and tries to Mario stomp on your head, that’s it.  The game has two themes; random forest and purple caves.  To be fair the movie took place completely in the jungle. But even the MSX original managed to vary up its levels.  Every 3 levels the game switches to Big Mode, where you control a giant Dutch in a forced scrolling level.  It looks impressive but is ridiculously simple.  The battles against the Predator here are at least interesting but they cannot save the game.

With all of its various flaws it would be easy to say Predator is extremely difficult.  But I would say it is frustrating more than anything else.  Spending half of a level scrounging for a weapon is not fun.  Trying to decipher the unclear backgrounds gets old fast.  The near instant enemy respawns are just a bad design choice.  The game at least provides health items and extra lives regularly.  But that just means you will survive longer to tolerate a game that wears out its welcome early on.  At thirty (yes, thirty) plus stages I can’t see any sane human being having the patience to put up with Predator’s nonsense to reach its anticlimactic conclusion.

In Closing

Predator is bad.  Really bad.  It is among the worst licensed titles on the system and a complete waste of time.  Watch reruns of the movie instead.